Conflicted thoughts redcorvette: Hi all,
I'm brand new here so please bare with me. I would like some advice here. I'm dating a guy who is "conflicted" about dating me. On one hand he really likes me, thinks I'm smart, fun and beautiful but on the other hand he is conflicted because I'm a student at a school he teaches at. I'm over 26, he's in his late 30's. I only have a year left until I graduate but for him that is still a problem. He said if I went to a different school or if this was my last semester, he would not have an issue with it. So he has ethical concerns. When we go on our dates, he have so much fun along with a kick of passion. But again, he is conflicted. I asked him if he wanted me to see someone else he replied saying that he was thinking of telling me that but realized right away if he did, I would be either engaged, married or in an exclusive relationship by the time I graduated next Spring and that was something he could not live with, he would hate himself for doing that.
He also mentioned that he "will get over this" but doesn't know when.
My questions here are: What do you make of all of this?? is he worth pursuing?? will he eventually get over this conflict??
Any advice or answers to my questions would be great and deeply appreciated!!
Re: Conflicted thoughts crushedman: My opinion is that in all likelihood, his 'conflictions' are not what they seem. In other words, he is lieing to you about the true reason or lieing to himself. Put yourself in his shoes- if you were really into someone would you let the fact that they were your student deter you?
cm
Re: Conflicted thoughts Magalucia: I will take what he says at face value and believe he is conflicted and he has good reason to be. I would be very surprised if the school does not have a very specific policy prohibiting such relationships. I think the relationship with a student, regardless of age, is imprudent at best and potentially career jeopardizing. I would try to put off the relationship until you graduate. A year is not that long. If you two are still interested after that then look each other up.
Re: Conflicted thoughts crushedman: I completely disagree with Magalucia's post.
Disagree 100%. It's not a big deal in college.
cm
Re: Conflicted thoughts wizer_now: I think you are looking into it too much and rushing for an answer and closure. Let things happen as they may. If he really falls for you, then he'll get over his hang ups. If there are other reasons, as CM suggested, then they will come out in time.
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