Re: I'm the step mother octoberbaby: [quote author=Crushy link=topic=41588.msg467497#msg467497 date=1172093046">
[quote author=octoberbaby link=topic=41588.msg467482#msg467482 date=1172092719">
Long story short she decided she wanted to work as a stripper (god only knows why she chose this perfession) and my fiancee couldn't deal with it. So they fought and fought until one day it they called it quits. There were alot of other things but this is the main reason for all the fighting.
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Okay, but were you in the picture before the break up?
NO NO NO I would never do that!!! Although a long long time before they broke up we were all at a mutual friends house (and I didn't know him at that time by the way) and everyone was drinking, well they had fought or it was a bad time and he went overboard on the drinking so a mutual friend of ours came and asked if I would please take his friend home cause no one there was sober enough to drive anywhere but me. So I agreed, we didn't speak on the way there or anything but I'm sure he told her I had given him a ride since his car wasn't there. It really wasn't a big deal to me but I did end up running into him after they had broke up and we knew eachother from the car ride home and it went from there.
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Re: I'm the step mother td7629: [quote author=Crushy link=topic=41588.msg467578#msg467578 date=1172096983">
I'm assuming he doesn't call you mom? That is where I'd draw the line with my boys' stepmom. She took my husband, but she can't have me boys. hehe ;D
Crushy :D
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I feel the same exact way!!! ;)
Re: I'm the step mother Magalucia: I like Crushy's idea about the Mother's Day shopping. I would also suggest that you invite her to lunch and have a civilized talk with her. Ask her if she is concerned about something. I think one reason my stepson's mother did not like me initially is because I think she had some misinformation about me. I would try to clear the air.
Re: I'm the step mother octoberbaby: [quote author=Crushy link=topic=41588.msg467578#msg467578 date=1172096983">
That is tough. I would like to think she'd appreciate the fact you love her son and treat him well. I can't stomach my ex's wife (was OW), but I'm glad my boys get along with her and she's good to them. They don't like how she came into their lives, but I want them to like her and respect her when they're with her. I told them from the beginning I wanted them to like her and not feel like they have to have bad feelings toward her because of me. She's got an adorable little girl too. Of course, they still have issues with her, but no more than to be expected given the circumstances. I honestly think she believes they have completely forgiven and forgotten. They've told me they will never care for or trust her like they do my boyfriend because of the situation. I just hope this will prevent them from ever doing something like that to their wives and children.
She sounds pretty insecure about her place with her son. Too bad because he's got to know there is tension there. Maybe you could take him shopping for her for Mother's Day and have him give her a card to his mom?
In what kind of situation does she tell you you're not his mom? I'm wondering if she feels threatened because you're more in tune with him and his needs?
I'm assuming he doesn't call you mom? That is where I'd draw the line with my boys' stepmom. She took my husband, but she can't have me boys. hehe ;D Good luck!
Crushy :D
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It is very tough, I actually bought some stuff for her new baby for My step son to give to her...So I tried that....There is really no reason for her to bring up the fact that I'm not his mom, she says it out of the blue. She was always civilized with me but she would also say things about me to my fiance when they would be arguing, she'd always bring my name into it, I always let that go until about a month ago she started saying things about my family (and no she doesn't know them, just knows my sisters name and my nephews name) I think she did it because she knew that was the one thing that would get to me. She crossed the line when she did that so I confronted her and thats when we started argueing. I think she has wanted to start a fight with me for a long time now, and thats what she got. So now we absolutely don't get along. He doesn't call me mom and if he does on accident I point it out and explain I'm his step mom and she is his mom and he says "I know, with a smile" I think he does it to be aunrey.
Re: I'm the step mother octoberbaby: [quote author=Crushy link=topic=41588.msg467588#msg467588 date=1172098847">
I'm with Mag. If she used to be decent and then turned, maybe a civilized talk in public without the boy there would be a good time to ask her why the sudden change? You could tell her you would really like to get along and if you're doing something that bothers her, you'd like to know so you both can discuss it?
Poor little guy. I just can't understand it.
Crushy :D
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Thats just it, I don't think I can trust her enough to go anywhere with her. She is more worried about me then her own kids. It's a sad situation exspecially for her kids.
