Re: Depressed and can't snap out of it Percy123: So dark before the dawn......but not for long. You just had finality to a long chapter in your life and your fellings are normal. We all want to embrace the thought that we will have someone and be together but in reality we are alone sometimes and people pass through our lives and things change. Now is the time for you to learn to be you again. You are not defined by "us" but by "you" and you gotta work back to that feeling of "you". You will not be alone forever, unless that is what you want. Being single is not a defeat and a failure, it is just a state of being. I am so sorry you feel isolated and know what how you are feeling. You gotta take care of yourself. Your tone sounds almost suicidal and you need to get away from that. If in fact that is how you feel, you need help asap. IN a while things will seem much clearer. Write a lot to this page, let these people give you insight and listen. You are so not alone in what you are feeling and experiencing.
Re: Depressed and can't snap out of it brielle123: I am so sorry that you are feeling like this. I wish I had some helpful words of advice, unfortunately I am kinda at a loss right now.
Just know that no matter what all this is not worth your life. It doesn't feel like it now, but there are more good things to come your way in the future. People in life are not destined for unhappiness, you are just going through an extremely difficult time right now. It takes everyone a different amount of time to get over the traumatic events that took place their lives.
I just wanted to let you know that I do completely relate with you, I went to court Monday and I am now officially divorced as well. I was doing ok for the past few months, but it's weird....now that it's finalized I just feel bad again, I don't want to be around anymore either...but I do know that it gets better, it has before, so it's got to again.
I think that we go through these "trials & tribulations" in our lives so that when the good times come around they are that much more sweet to us, we can then truly appreciate them. If we never went through any bad experiences, things that completely rocked our world...how would we know what to be grateful for? We wouldn't...we would just continue to take advantage of life and not truly LIVE it....I hope that makes sense, I've been kinda discombobulated lately.
Hang in there...(((hugs)))
Re: Depressed and can't snap out of it scuba_dvr: Since your ex is impotent, he probably avoids sexual activity with you due to performance anxiety. It's a vicious cycle...fear of being unable to perform builds, and the anxiety worsens the problem.
It sounds like the sex was the biggest problem for you guys. Sex therapists are available to deal with this type of problem. There are other ways to please a woman besides sexual intercourse.
As far as your depression goes, it may be medication induced ( the skin meds), and it may be necessary to switch to a different antidepressant. There are many types, many classes of medications. I suggest you speak with your doctor about trying a medication from another class.
Excercise is one of the best ways to beat depression. It's hard to get on that treadmil, or elliptical, or whatever, when you are lethargic to start with, but once you spend 30 minutes on a workout that gets your heart rate going, and the sweat pouring, the released endorphins will give you a lift that will last. You can't bottle the stuff.
Re: Depressed and can't snap out of it emily18: Dear Scuba Dvr, your response is the type that has infuriated me for the past few years. Obviously you are not a woman. AND NO, there are not "other ways"to please a woman. In my opinion. I can't go my whole life without a normal life!!!And therapy is not a bandaid for everything, i.e., a sex therapist. There are some situations that cannot be solved with a therapist. A sex therapist cannot MAKE him have an erection, CAN THEY?? I don't think so. If anyone could have helped with this problem, it would have been his urologist, and he was not able to help with the current treatments they have available. I understand you are trying to offer advice but your advice is not helpful. Therapy is not a cure all for every problem. I also should not have to justfiy the fact that I wanted a husband who could satisfy my basic needs when I was only in my twenties!!! NOT my fifties!!! It's too bad for me, I got a really crappy deal in life. Oh well, now I have to deal with it I guess.
Re: Depressed and can't snap out of it scuba_dvr: [quote author=emily18 link=topic=41604.msg468583#msg468583 date=1172176657"> AND NO, there are not "other ways"to please a woman. In my opinion.
[/quote">
Speaking from personal experience:
At times, especially during periods of anxiety and depression, I have had trouble achieving and maintaining an erection. I later determined, through counseling, that much of my emotional difficulties were due to unresolved problems within my marriage, and I have made great strides in dealing with them.
Anyway...in fact there ARE other ways to please a woman. Through the use of oral and tactile stimulation, as well as through the use of sexual aids, the pleasure achieved by the woman can be even greater than regular intercourse.
I am sorry that your close mindedness prevents you from realizing this, and benefiting from this fact.
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