Guys HELP ME qmambo: well after two months of him ending it in ireland and coming back to oz and me moving out et al, and me asking him if there is someone else and begging him to not end our 7 yrs together and suggesting counselling and finally this past week hes has agreed and we have spent some wicked time together again and talked about moving back in, having a life together a much better stronger one, kids, etc. and then i find out sunday night he had a two night thing with some 28 year old at home, he said she gave him a buzz made him feel alive and special and they leant on each other (his dad is dying of lung cancer and he saw him for first time in 3 years at home), i had to find out after a lovely day with him, he denied it for hours until finally coming clean. He swore on his mums life he hasnt slept with anyone else but me - totally monogomous but we had had a real shite past year together and she was someone who made him feel good about himself - i was destroyed mainly about the lying and forcing it out of him - he said they kissed once and have text a few times since coming back here - now what i thought i wanted im not sure now - he said she was young and beautiful and made him feel special - but thats all it was - i asked him why he would pursue it if thats all it was and he said cos he liked the buzz - and now hes asking me to give it another go with him, long term, forvere, house, kids the lot - what do you think? am i being played, did she just blow him off and i after 7 yrs versus 2 nights and sloppy seconds or did he freak out about his dad realise our relationship was bad and it was a cry for help? Please tell me
Re: Guys HELP ME sja: Didn't you say he was verbally abusive? Has he admitted that he was verbally abusive or at least in part responsible for the problems? I am all for counseling, but you both have to want to go and make it work. If you do not want to, you should not go. You don't have to want to be with him just because he has decided he wants to be with you. Is he trying to go to counseling to address your issues together or to "fix" you?
