Re: My confusing story soreheart: The hurt, the betrayal, the humiliation. I hear ya.
Sometimes its difficult because the other person seems so unlike the person you knew. How could this person treat you so bad? Then you realise that it is very like the person you knew.
You will have to feel all the negative emotions before the good ones come flooding back. That's because you are a good person and you loved this guy.
Wish i could make things better for you right now as its not good being in a dark place.
Re: My confusing story AMG: gns,
I can totally relate to your story...
I dont know if he was drinking and smoking pot when you first started dating... but this should be a serious red flag. He obviously lacks coping skills, and addicts are the most selfish people you will ever meet. You can not change him... No amount of love or understanding from your part will not matter until he is ready to change himself.
He does not sound healthy, therefore he is incapable of having a healthy relationship at this time. Do not sell yourself short! Try to see the bigger picture (although I know it is hard at times)! Let someone one else deal with all his bs, eventually you will feel better for it.
Re: My confusing story flipflopnomore: [quote author=AMG link=topic=42500.msg485641#msg485641 date=1174483416">
gns,
I can totally relate to your story...
I dont know if he was drinking and smoking pot when you first started dating... but this should be a serious red flag. He obviously lacks coping skills, and addicts are the most selfish people you will ever meet. You can not change him... No amount of love or understanding from your part will not matter until he is ready to change himself.
He does not sound healthy, therefore he is incapable of having a healthy relationship at this time. Do not sell yourself short! Try to see the bigger picture (although I know it is hard at times)! Let someone one else deal with all his bs, eventually you will feel better for it.
[/quote">
This is very true, and if I can shout this: GET OUT. Addicts are the most selfish people ever. They don't mean to be most of the time, but the drugs/booze are like a mistress in your relationship (quoted from a drug/alcohol counselor we went to). She will always be there lurking and tempting.
If I had a chance to do things over I would have not ignored the red flags that I clearly saw. YOU won't make him better, YOU cannot rescue him, and YOU cannot love him enough to make him a better person. These flaws are his character.
