I'm back...and freaking out missu: Hello...here I am again...I had been away 'cause I was on a trip...I went to the US for my brother's wedding.
And besides that, something happened...I finally gave in, and texted him, telling him that I had finally presented my thesis, and that I wanted to share my happiness with him because he had been such an important person through all my university years. Well, guess what? He answered back...nicely...he congratulated me, and said he was really happy for me. We texted each other like 5 more times, messages in which he called me beautiful (after getting past a cold start), even called me by the pet name he used to call me by, joked around with me, and signed the last one Forever yours....
How am I supposed to react to that?? I melted of course. Oh and I told him that I was going to Miami for my bro's wedding and he told me to send him pics and to "BRING HIM COOL STUFF!!!"...and I'm SUCH a SUCKERRRR...I bought him A PAIR OF GORGEOUS SHOES that I knew he would love...oh man. We haven't talked again after that day...but I emailed him the pics and told him I brought him something,.
Now I'm freaking out because this means that I will see him again...I'm SO SCARED, I'm SO ANXIOUS, it's been 2 months since the last time I saw him, and I can even feel the pain coming along. I don't even want to get back with him, there are NO strings attached to this gift I brought him, I just saw the shoes and immediately thought of him, and wanted him to have them. But now I'm waiting for him to answer the email, and I'm GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY, my appetite is gone...oh man...What the HELL did I get myself INTOOOOOOOO?????????
Re: I'm back...and freaking out Copperblade: You are a lost cause. Well there's nothing to freak out about now. What do you think is going to happen?
Re: I'm back...and freaking out missu: Haha...thanks for the lost cause thing...
Nothing good, I'm sure. More painful encounters in which we both remember how much we love each other, and also, how we can't be together 'cause it'd never work out. Not for now, at least. Maybe after a few years.... *sigh*
Re: I'm back...and freaking out Copperblade: Maybe... or maybe not... I get the feeling that your anticipation of bad feelings and being upset is going to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don't worry so much about this--so you bought him some shoes. No big deal. You both don't have the typical breakup, and you're not really competely done with each other. So maybe you can convince yourself not not feel upset in this situation?
Re: I'm back...and freaking out missu: I don't even know anymore...Hope is the last thing you lose...but I know in my mind that nothing's gonna happen. I haven't changed, he hasn't changed, so there's no use in trying to get back together.
I'll give him his gift...probably drop it off at his dad's or something. And that will be it. :(
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