numb fading17: well today is yet another down day. it's weird...i started this morning feeling very sad. i wake up and this heavy emptiness just completely falls upon me. i hate it. it happens every morning. and i had periods of crying. but then out of nowhere i just felt numb. still sad...but numb. it's hard to explain.
i don't like being this person. i used to be so happy and carefree...but the past 8 months i have turned into this sad depressed person who doesn't want to do anything. everything takes so much energy. but i hate going to my bed alone everynight...cause then the dreams come, if i can fall asleep.
ugh :'(
how did i let one person have such control over every aspect of my life? over my well-being?
Re: numb hope: [quote author=fading17 link=topic=43048.msg493719#msg493719 date=1175737961">
well today is yet another down day. it's weird...i started this morning feeling very sad. i wake up and this heavy emptiness just completely falls upon me. i hate it. it happens every morning. and i had periods of crying. but then out of nowhere i just felt numb. still sad...but numb. it's hard to explain.
[/quote">
I've been dealing with the numbness too. It is hard to explain. It's AWFUL if you ask me.
I think what happened was I got the divorce papers in the mail, and felt terrible....shortly after that, when my grandmother became very sick and passed away rather quickly, it was too much, and so I wound up in numb mode to cope.
Am coming out of it a bit and feeling the sadness again.
Re: numb fading17: hi hope,
i think you're right about the numbness maybe being a coping mechanism. i think our bodies just can't take the sadness for such long periods of time or if it becomes to much to handle...we kinda block it for a while...
sorry about your grandmother...<hugs>
Re: numb tripny2k6: I dont think they had control of every aspect of your life, they were just a huge part of your life. You are greiving hon. Its been 8 months for me too and Im not totally out of the woods yet. I have bad days. Thank God the dreams have stopped though.
You'll get there, but no without effort.
Re: numb JNA: [quote author=fading17 link=topic=43048.msg493719#msg493719 date=1175737961">
how did i let one person have such control over every aspect of my life? over my well-being?
[/quote">
Because we loved them...
Unfortunately they do not have or feel the same kind of love we did...Or screwed us over
The mornings were the worst for me but I can tell you this...
When I started feeling the "numb" you are starting to feel now
I was almost there...
A guy on another site use to call it a "calm"
He said and I quote...
It fades in and out for a time
Then back and forth (speaking of the pain)
Then comes a calm...
When you reach the calm you know you are there (over it)
As far as the rest...
Some of us "love"
We truly love with all our hearts where others do not and have faint love to give...
Hard to explain
Ones that truly love from the heart meet these people with No Heart...
And we get hurt ok
Stay Strong Fading...
You are a great person
JNA
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