My son is sleeping at his Dad's for the first time tonight SugarSweet: I guess I am just a ball of nerves right now. My ex moved out 18 months ago, and was really messed up at the time (drinking and such). So I refused to let my son be exposed to his Dad when he was in that state. He was allowed to visit, when I knew he was sober, but b/c I knew his drinking habits, I was not about to let my toddler stay the night with him.
So here I am months and months later... and he has apparently stopped drinking. And my son has started to show anxiety about all the important people in his life leaving him. He wakes up with nightmares, claiming that in his dream, I left him, my mom left him, my father let him etc etc.
So when my ex asked to keep my son tonight, although uneasy, I let it happen. I am sure it will be fine. He called to say goodnight, and when my ex got on the phone he claimed my son was almost crying while saying good night to me. Apparently during dinner my son stopped eating and said "I hope Mom is having fun tonight". ~brings tears to my eyes~ :'(
I have a little cold tonight, so I really should be taking advantage of the uninturupted sleep possibility. But I can not seem to let myself get in bed.
I knew this would be a hard step...but I need to let it happen.
K~
Re:My son is sleeping at his Dad's for the first time tonight cloud: Kimba,
I'm on the other end. I'm a father who misses his daughter terribly. And I can't wait for the nights that she gets to stay at my place.
She is able to sleep in her own bed at her mother's place but at mine she always wants to sleep in my bed.
She is not even 3, so I let her for the time being. I sometimes have trouble sleeping because she rolls around and sometimes sleeps perpindicular to the head of the bed.
But I wouldn't change of it.
I hope that your ex's drinking problem is behind him. If it is, one of the best things for him and for your son is for the spend some time together.
I know it's hard for you. I really do. And you are such a loving person to your son to do this.
You really are.
Re:My son is sleeping at his Dad's for the first time tonight SugarSweet: Thanks Cloud,
I have read so many of your posts, and I know that you are a loving father. No doubt in my mind.
My son crawls into bed with me too... Usually when he is feeling insecure or sick... and usually about 2:30am. I never know he is there, until of course, I get his toes up my nose. He too likes to take over the bed.
I too hope my ex's drinking is behind him. I want my sons admiration of him to be worthy, not because my son feels obligated. My son needs a good role model in his father. In all honesty,I also wish for my ex's sake, that he is sober and stays that way. I wish him no harm.
For the record, everything went fine. My son was exhausted when I picked him up at lunch today. But it was a great first step.
Take care Cloud.
K~
Re:My son is sleeping at his Dad's for the first time tonight Shanna: I am glad to hear all went well. I will need strength when /if the days comes when they go stay the night with their dad. Oh my heart hurts just thinking about. You are a very strong woman.
Re:My son is sleeping at his Dad's for the first time tonight SugarSweet: As are you Shanna! Thanks.
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