Re:Big Question for the Guys jason_stl: He probably wasn't looking for a girlfriend-type relationship as much as he was for romantic friendship. I have been in that situation before, where what I thought was going to be a great thing ended up that, on the romantic level, we just wanted different things.
Also, four dates in nine weeks ... I am sure your father being ill during that time didn't help things, but it doesn't look like a ton of fireworks. It is probably for the best he was very honest with you about what he felt. Better to know now before you invested more emotions into the budding friendship.
There are tons of fish out there. If he does respect you enough, maybe he knows other people that you would be interested in?
Re:Big Question for the Guys JimB: I don't usually post just to say "I agree with so and so" but I totally agree with Jason's conclusions. Sometimes you just have to take a guy at face value.
Sounds like this guy was very up front and truthful with you - count your blessings. It certainly says something about the quality of your instincts that you were drawn to someone as respectful and honest as he turned out to be. Better luck next time....
Re:Big Question for the Guys LSFool: Jason_stl,
Are you saying that he may have just wanted a "sex buddy" and that he may have thought that I was the type of woman to go along with it?
Re:Big Question for the Guys jason_stl: Nope. He sounds too honest and respectful for that type of person. Guys that are out for just the sex are a dime a dozen and easy to figure out. If he was out for just sex, or wanting to groom you into being his f-buddy, then he wouldn't have said what he said and the open-mouth kiss would have ended differently. Also, guys that are out just for sex wouldn't have talked to you on the phone while you were attending to your sick father. Those types of activities are reserved for family, close friends and boyfriends/girlfriends.
One last thing, I would maintain my composure during the first few dates with the farting and belching. That quickly takes you off of the pedestal when you meet someone and makes you more down-to-earth than a lot of guys can handle. Tons of guys that I know like to think of their women as prizes - anything to disillusion their fantasy too early tends to sour the relationship in some form or fashion (please refer to S&tC: Season 2 or 3 for more of an explanation).
Re:Big Question for the Guys LSFool: Jason_stl,
I agree with you on this particular guy. This makes it even worse because he was a very good catch.
I guess it was just a lack of chemistry. It is tough dating in this city because everyone seems to have 3 Ivy League degrees and I don't have one (just a bachelor's from a no-name school and 1/2 of a graduate degree from a decent school) I always wonder that when these men stop calling or are not interested, if it is because I am not good enough in terms of my education.
Incidentally, I have never farted or belched on any dates.
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