Re:Wondering if there is indeed a point to all this? Spectrum: What blows my mind is that he also told me, "Well, basically my life sucks, all because I screwed things up with you. I completely ruined my life over this woman, so I ought to at least try to make a go of it, don't you think?"
I found that more than a little bit disturbing, and asked him, "Is that the ONLY reason you're with her??" He said no, but I still wonder.
Last night I had a horrible dream. I thought I was done crying over this man, but apparently not. I dreamed that I went on a trip to Cleveland (?) and was staying at an expensive hotel, solo. I was attending a concert/sporting event (you know how dreams are) and he was there. Also attending were several young associates from my former accounting firm and a few of the managers and partners. We all happened to be seated together.
There was an intermission and everyone went to lunch. At the restaurant in the hotel, I walked in and saw him at a table, apparently alone. As I walked closer, I saw that sitting near the table were some of the associates from the firm. Also sitting there was the controlling mother of a horse trainer I met out here (a high-society type).
I tried talking to him about how I missed him, but somehow just made a fool of myself. I got angry, and everyone was staring at me. I left, but forgot my purse and had to go back. They had sent my purse off with the waitress, so I had to stand there humiliated and wait while everyone at/near the table looked at me as if I was a pariah. I remember thinking, "Now I'll never have a place in the firm again, he hates me, this trainer's mom is appalled at me and will tell everyone...."
I woke up crying, just lonely and feeling like an idiot. :'(
Thank god my dog was there to play dog-teddy-bear. :-[
Spectrum.
Re:Wondering if there is indeed a point to all this? Kinney26: Hey, spec
if you do somehow oddly end up in Cleveland, stop by for a visit. :)
As far as getting completely over someone, I was told it takes 3-5 years. So if feelings pop up from time to time it is normal, yet very frustrating I know.
