Another bad day today. jojo319: So my wife has said that she doesn't think she can ever have the same feelings again. I just feel cheated, like I should have been the one to leave. I put up with an alcoholic Bipolar for 5 years, and I stuck with it. Since we have a house together with no equity at this point, I don't have much of a choice but to stay living there. My brain is telling me that this is for the best since we are just way to different. But my heart is CONSTANTLY reminding me of the good things about her (not too many of which I'm seeing lately). Even when I stay busy, I still think about her. The weird thing is, I've never really been very happy. I was just waiting for her to mature and I thought everything would be great. Now I truly see that she is unwilling to change anything to save/improve our marriage. I just don't know how I'm going to handle further contact with her. I'm tired of thinking there's hope, when she flatly says there isn't. How can I go from depression to anger? I need to live my life, and my job is suffering as well. I also just read an email I received from her about 6 days ago that says: "I'm never going to leave you EVER" which basically was a punch in the gut. I really need help with this. I'm falling apart.
Re:Another bad day today. jojo319: I forgot to mention that my shrink says that I'm somewhat controllling ( never of her), and that he believes it's so hard for me because I have NO control over the situation.
Re:Another bad day today. Shanna: I don't recommend reading the old emails it jsut hurts more if you do. It hurts me to know stbx cheated and then he wanted me to leave even though they aren't together anymore.
It really halps me to focus on the kids....maybe get a dog? Pets give wonderful unconditional love, but then again are you able to take care of someone besides yourself right now? Any way the point I was trying to make was I am making it by using my time and energy to make the kids happy. Coming here often helps, too.
Re:Another bad day today. bloke: [quote author=jojo319 link=board=1;threadid=4580;start=0#msg35989 date=1096386759">
The weird thing is, I've never really been very happy. I was just waiting for her to mature and I thought everything would be great.
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Sadly, many of us get into a relationship with someone who we think has the potential to be fantastic. But I now recognise this about myself - I would not buy a house that needed a lot of work to fix it up because I do not have all the right skills for the job and may make it worse instead of better, or I may find after several years that I don't seem to have got as far as I would have liked. Next time I will assume that what i start out with is as good as it gets.
