dealing w/friend's problems?? allnewtome: Last night one of my close friends,(She and her husband were our "couple best friends") shared some concerns about her marriage.
I tried to be positive and explain I thought her concerns were very normal in a normal marriage. I think they are a wonderful couple and they are just experiencing normal marriage "problems." But my gosh who am i to give any advice??????
I think that she is just paranoid b/c my stbx did things that we never expected so she doesnt' ever want to be blind sided like i was.
Then i have another friend having relationship issues that i do think she will end up hurt. BUT once again who am i to give advice.
I don't feel like I can be negative w/out them thinking well you're going through a divorce of course you think negative things. Then I feel like I sound like an idiot to the first friend trying to say don't worry these things are normal!!!
i feel like the blind leading the blind.
has anyone else ever dealt w/this???
Re: dealing w/friend's problems?? dave13: allnewtome-
You may be much more insightful than you give yourself credit for. When we are in a bad spot it is often harder to see our own immediate situation than it is to see other peoples. Of course now you face to face with it. I guess all it comes down to sometimes is simply being there for your friends and offering them what you can. Believe in yourself.
Re: dealing w/friend's problems?? Marb_Man: Most of the time people are not looking for advice they just want someone to listen. I would rather get my advice from a stranger than a close friend..But all of my friends I have known here in my town all suck because they are all selfish ;D
I have got the best advice from my friends on Ojar believe it or not. ;D I dont know what my comments had to do with your question. I just feel like talking tonight.
Re: dealing w/friend's problems?? wakepner: allnewtome,
this is something i have also struggled with. often times, especially when it is a bad day, i have to be honest with the person and remind them that it is hard for me to be positive about the situation. of course, this is not how i am all the time but i think it is fair to those friends and family. but others are correct, we have a different insight and can often give great advice to help build relationships. just make sure you take care of your needs and do not scarfice them for others!!! ;D
