Re:Article: Men Marry Down For Fear Of Infidelity jen: From the female perspective, I will say that I have noticed that many men are intimidated by strong, independent, smart women...
Sometimes it seems like because we can do things for ourselves, that some men take that to mean that we don't really need them...the whole gender role thing...and I guess the conclusion that many men would marry down because they are afraid of infidelity is interesting...Perhaps there is less risk when it comes to a subordinate...keeping the power/control or something...But, basically I think it comes down to self-esteem and how comfortable a man is with himself.
p.s. Seth, I'm sure your professor appreciated being reminded that she's hot ;)
Re:Article: Men Marry Down For Fear Of Infidelity in_search_of: Hmmm, this is interesting to me, as my friends and I (mostly law students) have discussed this thing many times. Because we are all fairly intelligent, or so we would like to think, indepedent strong women. And we have noticed that if you are talking to a "normal" guy, then he finds out that you are a law student he automatically assumes that you are out of his league. Since I look young, I usually leave it as "I'm a student" for a bit, until they get a chance to share a few words with me to prove that I am fairly down to earth (for the most part, though I can be a space cadet at times).
In fact, this came to view in reality just the other day. I went out with a guy to dinner who works at the same factory that my dad does (yes folks, my dad works in a factory...silly guy, two college degrees and he works in a factory building tires, because he likes to go home at night and not think about work).
Any way, we were talking and he goes, oh yes, I have a story that you will find funny. So we had met at a bar, and I was sitting talking to a friend of mine, and we ended up talking to this group of guys who all work at the same plant as my dad. Well, we ended hanging out with them most of the night. So when we were at dinner. S, says to me, yeah, my friends were giving me all sorts of grief after we met you and K. They said there was no way that you were going to do anything with me ever, because you are a "law student" and too good for us guys out here. He said they just went on and on about how there was no way that I was ever going to actually go and do anything with him. When in fact I was more than happy to go out with him and have dinner and hang out. He is a nice guy, and the least of my concerns is WHERE he works, just THAT he works.
But yes, I do think that many guys are intimidated by women who are 'perceived' as more powerful or smarter, or somehow else out of their league. I think its interesting that they did a study on this.
though, I have to agree with jake that it appears that the study methodology was a bit off, and the results are likely not particularly valid.
Re:Article: Men Marry Down For Fear Of Infidelity Kinney26: I have to say that I am not really intimidated by smart or powerful women. I am more intimidated by the super hot women. I guess it is more has to do with looks when I think a woman is out of my league. Smart woman are fine. I am a semi intelligent man so I really don't want to be with someone that is dumb as a rock. If a woman makes a great living that is awesome. I definitely wouldn't pass up a woman just because she is a lawyer or a doctor or something. As long as they can be down to earth and fun that is what matters to me.
Re:Article: Men Marry Down For Fear Of Infidelity in_search_of: I wonder if there is companion study to go with this that talks about whether women marry up and for what reasons...I know you have some comments on that one I am sure (all of you) but, I think its beyond the money or the status or all that crap. I think that women are raised to attempt to marry up...for the most part. I mean, we spend our entire childhood hearing "marry a doctor or a lawyer" (or maybe that was just my family...).
That, and my next question is, I have never once met a guy who does not claim, to have no problem with smart independent women, however, when push comes to shove, I think that guys are not as comfortable with women who are perceived as smarter than them for the reasons that are pretty obvious from my little story.
However, its a nice thought that you all have no problem with the smart, independent girls....I just have some issues believing it. Esp when meeting people in random situations, because then you don't even get the chance to really know if they are down to earth or fun. For instance, Kin, if you had met me at the bar, and, found out that I was in law school right off, and not been stuck in a crowd with me, with no chance of escape, would you have stuck around long enough to find out that I am immensely cool?
Re:Article: Men Marry Down For Fear Of Infidelity Kinney26: I would have no problem with you being in law school. It's all about how you carry yourself. If you act cool and and don't act like yout better than everyone than there is no problem. Now if you sit there and try to make yourself above me and and talk about how you are in law school and therefore somehow that makes you better than me then there is a problem. I guess what I am saying is, if you are cool to me than I will be cool to you and if are a stuck up Biotch than F off. 8) ???
ps, and yes you are immensely cool, for a law student :P
kidding, you are the sh!t
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