Re:I need a leavee... Runehawk: [quote author=Beren link=board=6;threadid=6101;start=0#msg48677 date=1103048290">
Jake, I think when most of us define "leaver" and "leavee," we mean it emotionally. [/quote">
Naawww, that can't be right: give me a moment to let me read it again.
Nope! My eyes havn't betrayed me: That *is* what he wrote!
"Emotional Leavers"?!? Not to offend anybody, but: Awww, come on! ::)
Speaking as a Leavee, a Leaver is the one who first cries "abandon (relation)ship" and then leaves. Cut-n-dried, plain-n-simple. 'Reasons' and other 'explanations' beyond that definition speak of delusion more than anything else, I should think.
If you left, you are the leaver. Unlike other opinions found here, I don't think there's necessarily any shame in being a Leaver. But *please* refrain from taking the Humpty-Dumpty-like position of "words mean what I want them to mean" as in a kind of Alice in Wonderland salve. - r
Re:I need a leavee... lemondrop: Whoa Runehawk...
So if you found out your woman was cheating on you, would you forgive all and stay with her???
I'm a hard-core leavee (got walked out on and left in "limbo", was given the whole "I love you but I'm not in love with you" speech, etc, etc...)... I didn't find out about the OW until much later but if I had - whoa - there's no way I would have been begging to have him come back...
IMHO, once someone cheats on you, they have left you... and that makes you the leavee...
Re:I need a leavee... MadorSad: R
But in the above cases the SO abandon (relation) ship and did not tell anyone including them self so I'd have to stand with Beren & the others on this
MoS
Re:I need a leavee... Safetykc: LD,
The idea of looking for leavee's sounds good on surface, but you can never know the damage caused by someone being left. My ex-wife was married previously and was left unexpectedly by her first husband, who just decided he was done one day, he did have outside, "interests" in other people as well.
Anyway, my ex was devasted from this and recovered somewhat, met me and we dated, etc, and married etc, and she did the same thing to me that was done to her. Was just done one day and was having an affair as well.
Just amazing how people can go through that kind of devastation in their marriages and turn around and do it to someone else.
Dating is just like roulette I guess, just hopefully not like Russian Roulette... :P
Take care,
Safety
Re:I need a leavee... jen: LD,
[quote"> I've decided to limit my romantic interests only to guys who have a great sense of humor (boardering on caustic sarcasm) and who have been dumped and crushed by some thoughless chick who didn't know just how good she had it when she did the dumping.
[/quote">
LMAO at that description, but I truly think you may be on to something... #1: a fabulous sense of humor is a MUST....#2: It is absolutely difficult to connect w/ leavers or someone who absolutely devastated somebody else's life and #3: if they've lived, loved and learned and are ready and willing to get on the ride again, well that shows you a little something about their strength to get through life's difficult times...
So, in a nutshell, I guess:
Humor + Strength of character + Hope = my ideal man
Hmmmm...do you think I'm asking for too much? Oh well. There's always tomorrow...
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