Re: now what ... barelybreathing: Tell yourself this,
He is a preference and not a need. You would like for him to be in your life and vice versa, but you don't "need" him in your life. If you change your thinking a little here, it will make the transition better. You will find yourself feeling less desperate and less co-dependent on the relationship.
Whenever I feel that angst well up inside me for him and the marriage, I remind myself, I don't need him, he is merely a PREFERENCE.
BB
Re: now what ... achingallover: This is a total toughie for me too. I know, the idea of this person being out of my life in any way FOREVER is really scarey. It's especially hard becuase he's coming around a little bit to the fact that he's not only divorcing me, but treating me really crappy because I'm reacting to it. He actually told me he was sorry he was ignoring me and saying mean things to me the other day. Now he is out of town and when he comes back, we will be living in the same house until things are organized financially. We don't meet with the legal mediator for 1 1/2 weeks. It's going to be really hard - mostly because I think he is in a space to be nice to me, which will be much less stressful in our house in the remaining time we're here - but it will mess with my head. I certainly don't want him to go back to being nasty to me, but the nice stuff will be hard in a different way. The friendship factor will have to be set in motion, I think, until we can physically seperate. man, this sure isn't any type of fun at all.
