Re:Signed the papers! BigRunner493: well after a week and a half of my stbx filling my head full of hopes that we had a chance of reconciling, i think she was f*ing with me.
she called my snl (whom i live with) to ask how i was doing because she was worried about me because of the way i was the day i signed the papers (a little depressed). snl asked her "what do you expect?. how do you want him to feel". it was been a tough few days. the bf is over more and more now, basically spending the whole weekend over there. my daughter has been wanting to end our time together early because she misses mommy. today especially was bad because only after 2 hours she wanted to go home (the first 2 hours all i heard was stuff about the bf). i went to my older brothers to help him move furniture and i broke down in tears (he is divorced also with 2 older daughters). he talked with me for a bit and reassured me i was being the best dad i could be.
so i'm slowly recovering. i just need my life to be off slow motion. i'm building a house, but it is taking forever for the permit get approved (2 months). i just want to get going with my life. i want to start dating, but can't seem to get "interested" in it and feel like i'm cheating those that i date because i'm not really into it.
oh well, enough of my babbling..
thanks for asking for the update chey.
br
Re:Signed the papers! jen: BR-
Even if the divorce will be final next month, it may feel like life is in slow motion for a while longer - especially since your stbx was talking possible reconciliation for a while...it would be hard to get closure and start moving forward when part of you is still holding on to that possibility.
Your brother is right - you are being the best dad you can be for your daughter!
I know it can be really difficult to be patient to wait for the next chapter of our lives to start - I struggle with that every day at least a little bit - some days I struggle with it a lot. Just be okay with not being ready to start dating if you are not really interested...I know that part of me really wants to date because I miss having that connection in my life...but the few times I have gone out, it has felt pretty flat...and I don't think it's so much that you are cheating those you might be dating - but cheating yourself. Give yourself time to heal and be whole again. I know that is advice I need to take as well - I am torn and go back and forth between wanting a connection and not really wanted to connect on a meaningful level because I'm just not ready for it...
take care,
mtmo
Re:Signed the papers! BigRunner493: mtmo....thanks.
i just tell myself that i'm still young and there is no problem being single for awhile and living a life that i haven't had a chance to since i was 18.
good luck and pm me anytime to need to swap stories.
br
Re:Signed the papers! browngreen: Hey- You're eons ahead of me. My STBX just left for vacation and said he'd file when he gets back. I can't WAIT to get the papers, and to have it all be OVER.
Ho hum...
I think you're lucky. FOr some stupid reason I needed the peice of paper to tell me I was safe to be committed and now I need a peice of paper to tell me it's OK to move on.
I'm actually starting to think "rebound" sounds like a lot of fun.
What about you? Have you entertained any mischevious ideas?
BG
Re:Signed the papers! BigRunner493: hey bg.
yes, i've had a rebound, and it was exciting, but at the same time unfulfilling. just not the same. i haven't been single since i was 18 (now 31) so i'm still adjusting. i can't seem to tell the difference between casual dating and the whole bf/bf thing.
br
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