I am going insane StarAngel_8: I am not coping at all with my breakup. I was in a 4 year relationship and we broke up on the 23rd of October last year, and I am still feeling the breakup like it was yesterday. I am exhausted. I still cannot stop the constant 24hr thinking and it is driving me insane. It has now been over three months since we have been apart, and I am still in shock each and everyday and it seems to be getting worse, not better as there is more distance between us. How on earth do I stop feeling like this and just move on and get over it? I am still crying everyday. I hate this feeling it is just horrible. And to top it all off, I still want him back and I am living in hope that we will reconcile. Is that just insane or what? Deep down, I am still in denial and just dont believe that he has left me for good becuase half of me is thinking "yeah, he will be back." I am not coping. What can I do? I just want him back so much because he was so familar to me and I cannot bear the thought of being with another man. I dont want to. It would feel like I am cheating. How on earth do you shake off this break-up feelings? I am going insane and still cannot believe that we are not together. Do couples reunite after a long separation? How do you get over it since it has been over three months now? I am desperate for answeres. I feel like I will have a nervous breakdown!! And I have the biggest urges each and everyday just to see him. What is going on with me?
Re:I am going insane Dino: I'm sorry you are still feeling this way after 3 months. It's natural to feel sad but it's not healthy for you to still be in denial after this much time. You have to makes steps to allow yourself to accept this. I don't think you can make any progress until you have accepted it.
You don't have to be with anyone else at this stage. Spend some time being single. Learn that you don't need someone. I am slowly learning that after 6 weeks.
Do whatever you have to to feel better. If being angry at him helps, then feel that.
It is possible that people reconcile after such a period, but you shouldn't hang around waiting for him. If he is aware of your feelings, then he isn't going to hurry coming back to you. He will know that he can come back anytime, after doing anything and you will take him back. The best thing for you to do is accept it, start moving on and start healing.
Start doing things for yourself.
Just know that there are many people in your situation and we have all been there before. The time to heal is different for different people. But you need to take that first step.
Good luck
Re:I am going insane sheydp: If you really can't seem to get over it by yourself, maybe it is time to think of asking for some professional help. Have you thought about a counselor? I'm sure they could really help - and NOT because you are going insane! It is normal to be a bit obsessive, but not healthy in the long run. Please see if a therapist can help! Also, post here, we aren't therapy, but we will listen and respond!
Re:I am going insane LostTeacher: StarAngel_8:
i am in a very similar situation, seperated at start of november, out of blue, and felt like world was coming apart. one of the things that really did help me was a counselor. even if you have friends that you feeel comfortable talking to, a counselor can offer you some advice as to how to combat this terrible feeling. i don't see her too often, but when something really stressful happens (like at christmas, and just recently when i moved into my own place), she helps me to see that the sadness is normal, and helps me to put things into perspective. what you thought might have been a perfect relationship, may very well not have been healthy for you. you might not want to hear that, and believe me, i never thought that of myself either (we were even voted most likely to get married in high school), but once you really discover your feelings, you might see that it's much better for you this way, even if you can't be happy with that right now. it's one thing i am struggling with, believing that this is the best thing for me, even though after 3 months i still miss him like crazy. but working out my feelings with friends, family, ojar, and a counselor have helped me greatly. it may do the same for you. ;)
Re:I am going insane Samanthain: What you are feeling is normal which isn't to say that you might not need good counseling to get over it. It's a tough, long process and enough to make anyone a little insane but it's not perminent! :) Hang in there and let your feelings out here and with a counselor where it's safe and everyone will understand.
