Re:Does everyone have a concience? gumby55555: Hey, CD... I'm so sorry to hear about that, buddy! Wow, that's just one of the worst things I could imagine. I actually responded about this a little while ago but I'll paraphrase it somewhat below.
To me, the infidelity itself, in many ways, seems to indicate a fundamental willingness to follow unhealthy instincts. I am, of course, generalizing but I do think that if someone betrays you like that, usually, that indicates an emotional immaturity and a fundamentally unhealthy outlook. I'm not saying it can't be changed; but it doesn't change often (hence the saying, once a cheater...). I think the only way around it is to just have a policy of total and utter honesty from both parties. Anything less than that, I think, increases the risk of spiralling into a pattern of deceit and lies. I'm really very sorry you found this out, CD...
Re:Does everyone have a concience? marfanoidus: CD, you're asking a question to which you already know the answer.
I think what you're really getting at is that you are very irritated by the roller coaster which her decisions and lies forced you to take a ride on. Its normal to resent the turmoil unwittingly heaved upon us by those very ones who are supposed to love us.
Its life, and life happens.
There are people out there who simply don't care if their actions hurt other people. Those of us who are hurt - well, yes, it hurts. But it also teaches, and makes us stronger, and wiser - but only if we let it.
good luck to you,
walt
Re:Does everyone have a concience? noclue: I found out right before Christmas that my husband cheated on me. He told me three weeks after I found out, that he had cheated on me 3 times before when we were dating. (7 years) He thought that cheating was a part of his past. I wish I had known, I would have never married him. To answer your question, before if I had been asked that I would have said yes but now I can honestly say no I do not think everyone has a concience at least my stbx does not.
Re:Does everyone have a concience? CoryL: I hope everyone does, especially my STBX.
That may sound weird because she hurt me, but I want to know that she has to live with that for the rest of her life. That she had a man who loved her more than he loved himself and she hurt him very badly. I want her to think about how she could have handled it differently, how she could have not left me in limbo.
I don't want her to get hurt, but live with that "guilt" for the rest of her life.
Cory
