Just did adumb thing tupsie: :-[God I'm such an idiot . I got really impulsive and text messaged the girl my stbxh has been talking to.It wasnt anice message Isaid"she was a bitc*and to go to he!! and that I hoped someone would be there for her husband the way she has been there for mine what goes around comes around".Not a good thing to do because my stbxh got mad and said he wasnt going to be nice anymore. What he has done has not been nice as far as walking out on his family but he has still been civil now I probably realy screwed it up and made things worse. Now heprobably wants to be with her morethan ever. Idiot !!!!!
Re:Just did adumb thing Dino: Oops, that wasn't that best thing to do, but you are naturally going to feel angry in certain situations. Now that you know what a mistake it was, you can stop yourself doing it again in the future. Don't be too hard on yourself though, we aren't emotionless robots, we humans make mistakes.
Re:Just did adumb thing tupsie: Ive said somethings to this person twice before . i did apoligize to my stbxh dont know if it helped . we have a son I feel so stupid but peole keep saying things to me about what hes doing which just keeps opening the wound.
Re:Just did adumb thing teacherwriterguy: You already followed my advice - how cool is that.
Even if it feels wrong, definitely apologize and mean it.
I did almost the same thing right after stuff really came down in my marriage.
I wrote an angry e-mail to my stbx, and I'm not normally an angry guy. She wrote me an angry e-mail back. It hit me very quickly that, while emotionally liberating to say the things I said in the e-mail, practically it could be messy if we stopped talking, if the divorce proceedings didn't flow smoothly.
All I did was write and say, "I'm sorry for what I wrote. However I'm feeling, the two of us need to be able to communicate clearly. I'd like to dial it back a notch and maybe we can go back to talking civilly."
In my case, it worked (or has seemed to). We informally decided not to talk about emotional topics, just the "business" of getting the divorce done efficiently. And we've been able to hold to it.
It's okay to eat a little crow once in a while if the rewards/consequences merit it.
teacherwriterguy
Re:Just did adumb thing LUCYLOVE: I did something dumb too... when I first found out what web site my bf signed up on I called them and yelled they ended up giving me his e-mail that I didn't know he had.... so I made myself a new one to and sent him a mssge saying I think I know u and u have a gf shame on you.... onceit went thru I bout s***; cuz I couldn't get it back... even though he won't know it was from me...it made me feel better...lol
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