I am so not easy kissingkim: I am so bored tonight, and in need of some adult companionship, so I go on one of the dating sights I have shamelessly signed up with. A guy 10 years younger than me trys and gets me to drive downtown for drinks after chatting 5 minutes. I completely shut him down within another 5....and he said goodbye quicker than you could have believed.
What a reinforcement in the whole dating scene biting the big potooie. Was smooth as silk until i definitely told him I wasn't hopping in the car at 8pm to drive an hour to meet someone I had met 5 min. ago. I am going to hate dating. That seems so negative, and setting me up for a bad time in general, but it seems like the men you meet "out" on the weekends are just trying to get laid, and just saying what they think we might need to hear at the moment in order to achieve that goal. I know I am stereotyping or something like it, and I know unfair. I am just disappointed in another Friday night at home, with a ton more like it ahead of me. I DO want to date, but not just to play, I take things too seriously and might be a lost cause.
On a good note, it was pretty easy to say no to this guy, not just for the fear factor. I am old enough to know what I don't want, what I do, and when I am pretty much being sold something I am not buying. Still not easy to check myself, but getting better at it.
K
Re:I am so not easy jen: Kim,
I hear you on this! It takes practice, I guess to weed through the dating junk (so to speak!)
There ARE men out there who are not out there just to play...it may just be a little tougher to find them sometimes and to know where to look for them. Not saying I've met many, but I know that they are out there :P
But, hey...think of it this way...there may have been a time in your life (I know in mine) when you may have driven that hour to meet some guy you just met for drinks...isn't THAT a thought!
mtmo
Re:I am so not easy kissingkim: Oh geez, at first I was like, no way, never, i would have NEVER done something that crazy.
But honestly I would have been half way there already. LOL
Somewhat funny sidenote, my 13 yr old came in after the first few minutes and said wow, mom, go meet him! (he believes my life stinks and i am the most boring person in the world..hmmm...) and I say NO, dear son, I JUST met him! and the guy says online, hey, it's just like meeting someone in the bar, not a big risk, and son says, yeah, really, mom, he has a point......you just will say no though, and goes tripping back out of the room. I must seem sooooo lame and old....
K
Re:I am so not easy teacherwriterguy: I don't think that story invalidates dating - I'd be dubious too if someone wanted to meet me 5 minutes after beginning to talk to me.
There's a whole spectrum of how you can look at dating and it's okay to be anywhere on that spectrum from serious to casual and anywhere inbetween.
Not sure how much you are stereotyping - I'm sure that's true of lots of guys. Of course there are always exceptions, but exceptions prove the rule. And the idea of running out that quickly to meet someone under those circumstances and the fact that he wasn't interested in talking otherwise. Yeah, he sounds like that kind of guy.
Everybody wants some companionship, but you want it on your terms and that's totally fair.
twg
Re:I am so not easy JimB: [quote author=kissingkim link=board=6;threadid=8605;start=0#msg68233 date=1109993047">
I must seem sooooo lame and old....
[/quote">
Beats the alternative. It takes good judgment to live to be old enough to be lame....
And yes, dating is stupid. Everybody who is "dating" has an agenda of some kind, whether it's getting laid or getting hitched. How tiresome. Here's how it happened for me: first, I was desperate for company, so I dated (online and off). Then I got sick of the agendas. Very shortly after, I gave up dating. Then, when I no longer cared and was just talking to people, I met my gf. (I hear similar stories all the time.)
So go pester your 13 year old. Why settle for lame when you can be annoying? ;D
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