Re:Newbie Here timetobefree: Thanks, Thinkin! Appreciate the compliment!
Amy ;D
Re:Newbie Here lemondrop: Amy - excellent post! Nothing to add... just wanted to say that you hit the nail on the head with this, "I would venture to say you are the exception and not the norm!". I agree 100%.
Re:Newbie Here krunk79: That is true--people do feel sorry for themselves when they're overwhelmed with grief. There is nothing wrong with this, and I don't think it's fair to be critical of them for it. This is after all a support forum. This is a place where those feelings are supposed to be vented.
And as Amy said, people evolve--they don't usually stay in this stage. Check out all the rest of the boards at the bottom like "Something wonderful happened today," or "Dating and the Single Life." I don't think those boards get as many posts because some people stop visiting the forum once they're over the inital grief, but you'll find that the people who stick around progress through the pity stage and begin posting things on other boards. Having one's husband/wife leave--especially if it is not expected, or learning about an affair is an extremely traumatic experience. It is perfectly okay to feel selfish and do what needs to be done in order to grieve. Think of the selfishness of the other party--if it's ok for them to go have an affair, it is certainly ok for the spouce left behind to have a pity party on support forum.
