don't wanna date craez: so i think i mentioned somewhere on here before that i met a cute fireman last weekend. well, last night on the way home from the gym, i realized i don't want to date. at all. unless lunch on sunday afternoon can count. i got myself so busy after my breakup, that i'm not willing AT ALL to give up ONE SECOND of my time. i can be as selfish as i want because i don't have to answer to anyone. i can come home whenever i want. i don't have to call and say i'll be late. i can come home and eat ice cream right out of the carton on the living room floor in front of the tv, and i don't have to talk about anything. i'm totally enjoying my freedom. however, the only thing that worries me....the only nagging thought i have in the back of my mind, is that if i continue to live life like this I'M GOING TO BE ALONE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's so scary. i don't want to be alone forever! i do LIKE having someone, i just don't want anyone right now. does that make sense to ANYONE who bothered to read this far????
Re:don't wanna date brokenman: I am right there with you. Hell, I have been divorced over a year and haven't had a desire to date at all. And at the same time I do not want to get old alone. Now, I do have my daugther and all my parental responsibilities, but beyond those I am right there in the selfish game with ya. I don't want to explain every little thing I do. I don't want to "have to" anything. Not to call to say I'm running late. Not to call to plan meeting for lunch or dinner. Not to go to bed before I am tired. So, if you made it this far craez, you are not alone. It is weird to be pulled in two directions at once.
Re:don't wanna date i_sing_alone: I feel the same way. I do like being alone, but then again I miss having someone to say, "You're never going to believe this- can you believe this!?" to...
It was hardest on me when my daughter was first born, because I wanted someone to share that with me so badly... to be able to say, "Awwwww, did you see what she just did?" etc, etc.
But I don't miss having to clean up after someone, try to talk to someone when I don't feel like talking, etc.
Re:don't wanna date craez: it's just wierd because at first i thought (and was probably right) that i didn't want to date because i was so devestated. but now, i just wanna be free! i never thought i'd enjoy it this much. i can't believe how much of my independence i lost in my relationship. i never even noticed until now, now that i have it back. what happened to me? how did i fall into the co-dependent trap???? anyway.................
I'm the king of the wooooorld!!!!!! (leo dicaprio)
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOMM! (mel gibson)
*drawing a blank*
Re:don't wanna date teacherwriterguy: I would think - at this point in the process - a little good-natured selfishness is an excellent thing.
I've made a point of going to the restaurants that I liked and that the stbx wouldn't go back to - or picking out movies I wanted to watch that got nixed because they weren't her style.
Just because you want to indulge yourself for a while doesn't mean you will be alone forever. Enjoy each feeling and each moment while you are in it.
I do get what ISA is saying about wanting to share things though - it's probably why I ramble on here about oddities... and friends that I let slip away I'm reconnecting with and family is hearing a WHOLE bunch more from me.
twg
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