For The "Star Wars" Fans out There.... Phyxius: Top 10 Things We Would Love to Hear Mace Windu Say...
10. You don't need to see my godd*mn identification, 'cause these ain't the motherf*ckin' droids you're looking for.
9. Womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'll never know, 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherf*cker.
8. This is your father's lightsaber. When you absolutely, positively, have to kill every motherf*ckin' stormtrooper in the room... accept no substitutes.
7. If Obi-wan ain't home then I don't know what the f*ck we're gonna do. I ain't got no other connections on Tattooine.
6. Feel the Force, motherf*cker.
5. 'What' ain't no planet I've ever heard of! Do theys speak Bocce on 'What'?
4. You sendin' the Fett? Sh*t, Hutt, that's all you had to say!
3. I wouldn't go so far as to say that the motherf*cker's a carpet. Yeah Chewie got a hair problem. What's the brother gonna do? He's a wookie.
2. Does Jabba the Hutt look like a b*tch?
1. Hand me my lightsaber... it's the one that says, "Bad Motherf*cker" on it.
The Top 11 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making Love.
11. "Ahhh! Yoda's little friend you seek!"
10. "Urm. Put a shield on my sabre I must."
9. "Feel the force!"
8. "Foreplay, cuddling-a Jedi craves not these things."
7. "Down here, I am. Find a ladder, I must!"
6. "Do me or do me not-there is no try."
5. "Early must I rise. Leave now you must!"
4. "Happens to every guy sometimes this does."
3. "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmmm?"
2. "Ow, ow, OW! On my ear you are!"
And the top most common thing Uttered by Yoda While Making Love.....
1. "Who's your Jedi master? WHO'S your Jedi Master?"
This next one is for d2b... ;)
Star Wars - Quinten Tarantino Style
1.) Luke now meets Yoda and Obi-Wan's ghost in a bar, Yoda (The Bar Keep) keeps telling Obi-Wan to get Luke some Soup.
2.) On Dagobah, when Luke has his vision of Han & Leia in trouble on Cloud City, the screen goes red and the "IRONSIDE" theme plays.
3.) Instead of choking him with the force, Vader slices off Ozzel's head and gives the speech: "As your leader, I encourage you from time to time, always in a respectful manner, to question my logic . . . ."
4.) Instead of carbonite, Han is now placed in Hospital with Buck (PG Rating Dies a screaming death)
5.) Stormtroopers now bleed........alot. (See comment above about PG Rating)
6.) The scene where Anakin avenges his mother's death now done in anime!
7.) Anakin calls Obi-Wan a "useless old Jedi", Obi-Wan snatches out Anakin's eye
8.) Instead of letting him fall down the air shaft, Vader throws Luke into his trunk after cutting off his hand and takes him to a Japanese hospital
9.) Stormtroopers now called "The Crazy 88,000,000"
10.) Darth Maul to Obi-Wan: "That really was a Honzi Lightsaber."
11.) The scene where Vader walks off shuttle craft is now accompanied by the Oshi theme.
12.) Han now shoots Greedo though a cereal box.
13.) Luke now wears a yellow jump suit.
14.) A pregnant Amidala leaves Anakin to escape.......oh wait, that did happen!
15.) Princess Leia's "Jabba's Palace" disguise replaced with a nurse outfit, complete with Red Cross eye patch.
16.) A lightsaber fight on HOTH (in the snow!!!!!)
17.) Darth Vader to the Emperor: "That boy deserves his revenge, and we deserve to die".
18.) Lando says: "I should have been Black Mamba!"
19.) Instead of mentally stacking rocks, Yoda teaches Luke how to put his fist through a wooden wall.
20.) Vader to Luke: "I killed Obi-Wan now I'm gonna kill you, with your master's lightsaber!!
Re:For The "Star Wars" Fans out There.... AmyMarie1972: Thought that the Yoda section was really funny.
Thank you ;D
Re:For The "Star Wars" Fans out There.... down2basics: yeah - I'm rollin - oh hell yeah - I'm rollin' on the floor! Those my man - were beautiful!! Thanks for the smile!
d2b - still laughing to the point of tears
Re:For The "Star Wars" Fans out There.... down2basics: d2b
still rolling
Where's Mace when ya need him? I like the version of him here! Wonder if George Lucas would consider loaning that character to Quinton for 1 movie!
still rolling
lmao
ROTFLMAO!
d2b - can't breathe - still laughing her arse off - and believe me brothers - there's plenty there to laugh off!
