HOW DO YOU KNOW betteroffalso: Hey Guys, Havnt been around in a while, well I have been around but just reading. Anyway, I have a question, does anyone else ever feel like they wont be able to trust again? I know people say, "when you know, you know"but I HONESTLY thought that with my ex. Everytime he told me he loved me, I felt it and believed it. Everytime he assured me of his love and his faithfulness, I felt it and believed it was from his heart. My point is, I cannot trust myself because obviously I was wrong. How will I know that the next person who devotes his life to me and gives his love to me and promises forever is being truthful? I thought he was being truthful. Is anyone elses faith destroyed? I just cannot trust that anything is forever anymore....I did that once and it ruined my life.
Re:HOW DO YOU KNOW Dino: i have wondered about this also. i trusted my ex, but i never really felt like she put me at ease. she made trusting her difficult.
the next time i meet someone special i think i will listen more to my gut regardless of how my heart feels.
I guess we can never really be certain. It's a leap of faith putting your heart in someone else's hands. It's a risk that goes hand in hand with love.
Re:HOW DO YOU KNOW JimB: Give it time, my friend. That trust in yourself will return.
When we're climbing out of a deep, dark well, we sometimes lose sight of the little light at the top. That doesn't mean the sun has gone out - just that a cloud is passing. Faith is a difficult thing to destroy, though sometimes it can be shuttered for a while. Yours will come back.
Re:HOW DO YOU KNOW betteroffalso: How touching, your replies made me tear up! Thank you! My faith is gone....I hope it is only temporary. I like the analogy of the cloud. I hear you with my ears, but knowing it to be a fact is hard. Your right, its a leap of faith, one I dont know if I will ever be willing to take again. My ex left 11/03 and our "D" was final last week. So its not like its recent. He moved on right away with OW and had a baby with her ...so on and so on. They say time heals, I am healed in the sense that I am over him, I have not feelings for him at all, its just my feelings of distrust now run deep. They scare me because I worry this will prevent me from finding happiness again. I see others hooking up left and right, and I feel like "man, how can they trust so easily", We were married 7 years, 2 kids, he was my first, I gave him everything! My life, I guess thats part of it. Im sorry, I know I am rambling! Thanks for listening.
Re:HOW DO YOU KNOW amola: boa....
yes, when you know you will know. i realize that makes no sense at all if you're not at that stage yet, but i've just hit it with the guy that i'm seeing....i just KNOW that i can trust him.
and what if i'm wrong? yep, could happen. i hope not, but it might. i've decided that i'm not going to live in fear of losing what i think that t and i have together. i hope to god that it works out but if it doesn't, it doesn't and there's not much that i can do about it except to give it my best shot!
it's definitely a leap of faith. no doubt about it.
hang in there!
:)
amola
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